Then came the difficult part. I went to God to pray knowing that I did nothing wrong. I could not pray with my heart, with my lips I could, but my heart and my conscience was wandering. What I knew in theory started arguing with me. I knew theoretically that I should not get angry or shout rather I should always be sober and kind and patient. But the situation made me to overcome all those things and justify my action. What my flesh wanted to do was trying to prevail over what God wanted me to do. The way my flesh wanted me to react was overpowering how God wanted me to react. Finally I had to surrender and confess that I was wrong in what I did and asked for forgiveness and more grace and strength to react and behave better next time. I could sense and experience the peace of God. Fake lip service to God changed to heart felt service. I could understand that I was wrong. None of my justification or law points could stand against the word of God which was working in my heart. Holy Sprit was reminding me everything I have read and I knew theoretically and asking me to make it practical in my life. I gave up and said, “Lord have thine own way."
You may ask what it was. It was God working through the Holy Spirit in a person’s life reminding him of Scriptures to transform him into his likeness. It was the Holy Spirit at work to change me so that I can be transformed more into the image of God and reflect the character and attitude of Jesus Christ through my life. I am glad God works even today through the Holy Spirit in our lives. We can resist that work easily and lose our sensitivity. We should try not to lose in and make sure we are reaching out toGod with our hearts and not only with lips.
Some people may question the need of confession and reconciliation for such matters. The Bible is clear on these things and I believe that the beauty of a Christian life is not only in having theoretical knowledge of different terms like justification, grace, sanctification, dispensation etc. An important aspect is walking with God and hearing His voice and allowing the Holy Spirit to work in our lives resulting in transformation.
God Bless you!